Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Big Boy Panties!

Well, we did it. We took the plunge and let the little man wear big boy panties! I know that sounds awful, but calling them panties is a long hard habit to break, and we are all trying!!

Oh how I love potty training, let me count the ways...umm..none! It's just not my favorite thing to do. I don't really mind all the potty talk, teaching, bribery, shooting the Honey Comb targets, etc...and I can even get past the sheer inconvenience that we have another "peer" on their own schedule, it's the fact that now my sweet well kept and clean child will now have to actually sit on a potty...bluh! Yes, I have a mental issue with toilets, it seriously makes me crazy. My own potty is bad enough, but someone else's?? and a PUBLIC potty is enough to do me in! When Addie was potty training, the thought of taking all three babies into a public restroom would cause me to have an anxiety attack, to the extent that I would put a diaper on her in the store and make her go in it. Don't judge..I had three under 2!
So, here we are now on round five. But this one's different, really different! I've dreamed of this day for so long... I've dreamed of my entire family sitting at a restaurant and when the little one says he needs to go potty, I get to sit and enjoy dinner while his Dad takes him!! This has been my job for so many years, and alas its finally his turn! But now that it's here, it's not the dream at all. More of a nightmare. The thought of my baby going into the nasty mens restroom is even worse! Double blah! Surely Troy wont be as cautious as I am to avoid any "excessive" touching of the toilet. Surely Troy won't suspend the baby over the toilet in mid air because he refuses to sit (we got bored with that real quick) and too short for the tippy toe trick! Yup, that's what I do, pick him up and suspend him at an angle and the weird part is, he actually goes! I'm pretty sure I would get stage fright and not be able to pee if someone was suspending me in mid air over a toilet. But not Jaxon, he's a champ!
So, at family dinner last night I asked the men in my family why no one told me about the unexpected random "split streamer"? The one that hit my friend's wall while the other hit the water??? That was awesome. They all just gave the sympathetic "Oh yeah, that one!" "I hate that!" "Did he get the wall yet?" "There's not a dang thing you can do about it!"
See to me, this random possibility seems like something that would be good to know when beginning the training adventure. Much like the "trailer". I'm still trying to work around this one. It's a "trailer" trickle after the main stream... the culprit that sprinkles on the potty, the pants and the floor..he thinks he's done, I think he's done, sure enough not quite done! Is he going to get made fun of that he wipes the drip and then wipes the potty for sprinkles like his mommy taught him? I asked this question to my brothers too..bad idea! I was informed that yes, I am messing him up, yes he will be made fun of, and no, there is no toilet paper in a urinal!!! AND that this job needs to be quickly passed over to his Dad before any further damage is done. Oh ok..the guy who works all day? I'm sure he won't mind making the drive home every 20 minutes for a potty break! and he's not a lot of help with the tips as he feels these are just things we figure out. Yes, I am figuring them out, and yes I realize there is more than one way to skin this cat...but I'm hoping this post might help some other first time potty trainers a little! In fact, feel free to call me, I'll share what I have learned, I have no shame. I just don't think it's too much to ask that someone write down a few tips for mommies trying to teach boys how to potty so we don't have to learn the hard way! This kid has peed on more clothes because I'm clueless.

I do have a favorite part of potty training though, it's their cute little bums and their widdle bird wegs (little bird legs) hanging out of the underwears. Pretty sure there's nothing cuter then a little guy in his drawers and boots. Rain, cowboy, he doesn't care! And he has no modesty. He ran into the front yard in nothing but a tshirt and boots to ride his scooter last week. If you thought Gracie was a fast two year old, you should see this kid on a scooter. Good thing my sweet neighbor raised two boys, so it didn't phase her that I was running down the street after my naked kid on a get away scooter!!

(Big sigh... ) So to all the boy moms who have come to my house, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I wiped your kids pee off the floor, off my walls, and out of the grout behind the toilet in sheer disgust...I just didn't know how hard it really is, I was ignorant! And to my friends whose homes I will soon visit with my son, I am sorry for that too!!... and will start packing my own disinfectant wipies :)


kadejesalee said...

Boys are gross! Ty took 10 months to potty train, and I am so HAPPY that is over with, but I still get the occasional trickle on the shower curtain, bath mat, clothes, side of the toilet....it goes on and on. Sigh. Yeah for only having one boy right? Sorry I missed you in Utah. Let me know the next time you make it up!

Church Fam said...

I'm laughing you call them big boy panties, because we had boys first so even my girls just call them underwear now :)